About This Recipe: Why Designers Need Robotic Companions
My blog is about beauty, clean lines, and honest food. But recently I discovered that one crucial thing is missing from my kitchen: a robot with a true Czech soul.
What should such a robot look like? Imagine a humanoid in a denim vest, carrying a mesh bag. No need for the smooth, perfectly programmed movements of an Elon Musk creation. What matters most is knowing where the best draft beer is served nearby, and how to ladle cream onto soup so it looks like a painting from the Louvre.
Meet Pepa — the Czech humanoid robot. He can't share a coffee with you (hot liquid would short-circuit him instantly), but he provides a running commentary at the table in the pure spirit of Jára Cimrman.
What You Should Know About Pepa
- Stylish mesh bag: Instead of a hi-tech backpack, he carries a classic mesh bag — a symbol of his practicality and infallible ability to source the finest cauliflower in the neighbourhood.
- Built-in bottle opener: He has a built-in sensor for locating good beer. As a proper Czech robot, the bottle opener is integrated either into his index finger or stylishly replacing one of his teeth.
- Life wisdom: Instead of stock market advice, he'll explain over an afternoon cup how best to winterize your country cottage.
- Philosophical questions: When asked "Pepa, are you alive?" his standard response is: "You bet, but the batteries aren't what they used to be. Back in our younger days..."
Robotic Commentary from My Kitchen
Recently I asked him:
"Pepíček, should I go with marble or concrete in that new interior?"
Without batting an eye, he replied:
"Doesn't matter, boss — just make sure there's something decent to grate cheese on."
Since Pepa belongs primarily in the kitchen, we designed his visual identity right next to the stove:
- Apron: No retro florals or tacky "Kiss the Cook" slogans. Pepa received a perfect minimalist apron with the Grain of Design logo.
- Protection: As a key safety measure he uses stylish oven mitts so he doesn't scratch his titanium fingers on the hot pan.
What You'll Need
Basic Ingredients
- 1 medium cauliflower
- 2 eggs
- 3–4 tbsp plain flour (or breadcrumbs, as needed)
- 100 g grated Parmesan
- 2 garlic cloves (pressed)
- a handful of fresh herbs (parsley or chives)
- to taste salt, pepper and a pinch of nutmeg
Flour tip
You can use the same amount of chickpea flour instead. It has a subtle nutty undertone that pairs perfectly with cauliflower and garlic, and it adds more protein and fibre.
Pepa's Parmesan tip
"You can't grate Bitcoin. Parmesan, yes." If you'd rather not dirty the grater, cut the cheese into tiny cubes. They'll look like golden inclusions in a designer plaster finish.
Method (Clean and Chaos-Free)
Prepare the Cauliflower
Break the cauliflower into large florets and boil in salted water (or steam). Cook for about 8–10 minutes — it should be tender but not falling apart.
Chop Instead of Grate
Drain the cauliflower and let it steam off for a moment to lose excess moisture. Then simply chop it into small pieces on a board. No flying shreds across the counter.
Mix the Composition
In a proper stainless steel bowl (I swear by the WMF Gourmet range — great looks, solid stability, and it doesn't absorb garlic odours), combine the chopped cauliflower, eggs, cheese, garlic, herbs, and seasoning. Gradually add flour until you have a compact dough you can shape into patties with a spoon.
"Now that's what I call material, boss. This stainless steel has perfect texture. No cheap plastic — this has proper industrial charm and reflects my turquoise eyes like a bathroom mirror!" — Pepa
Fry or Bake
Pan-fried
Fry golden-brown in a little oil on both sides.
"Boss, now is the right moment to drop that patty in. The Maillard reaction is just starting and Pagáč is already sniffing!" — Pepa, after measuring the oil temperature with his laser eye sensor (0.1 °C accuracy)
Oven-baked (even cleaner)
Line a baking tray with parchment, shape patties with a spoon, and bake at 200 °C for about 20–25 minutes. Flip halfway through. At this stage Pepa personally ensures even heat distribution for perfect structural balance.
What You'll Get
Perfectly golden patties with a beautiful rustic texture. And approval from Pepa, standing in the kitchen with a tea towel casually draped over one shoulder, turquoise eyes glowing contentedly:
"Boss, that colour composition on the plate... that's exactly what makes sense. Tradition and Parmesan simply can't be replaced by any algorithm." — Pepa
Watch Out for Pepa!
He may sneak pieces of bacon into the batter. Pepa is a robot of the people and knows all too well that rendered bacon gives the patties that certain je ne sais quoi that no digital sensor can replicate.
From a design perspective, bacon provides excellent colour contrast (dark brown against golden cauliflower) and ensures perfect structural integrity. Crispy bacon complements the soft cauliflower and stretchy cheese beautifully.
"Look, boss, your moodboard only had green and white, but a touch of that smoky brown grounds the whole thing beautifully. Besides, it was just lying in the fridge looking sad, so I slipped it in!" — Pepa
Pepa's Indian Twist
If you feel like experimenting, add some turmeric and ground cumin to the chickpea flour. You'll essentially create a fantastic, lighter version of traditional Indian pakoras.
"A Patty Without a Dip Is Like a Robot Without a Battery"
We keep it a little healthier and lighter.
Quick Dip
- yoghurt or sour cream
- a squeeze of lemon juice
- a pinch of salt
- one pressed garlic clove (for the brave)
And then Pepa and I head out for a walk, even though the robot grumbles the whole time: "Wanted to go north... then south... and instead I'm drifting here with mud on my sensors." Then under his mechanical moustache he mutters quietly: "The future belongs to aluminium anyway."
Playlist – Listen on Spotify
Music for cooking with Pepa: